Processing the Rainbow-phobia

A purely scattered ranting to just get it out of my system after another week of ridiculous politics and continual anti-LGBTQ+ shit. There’s rainbow-phobia going on in America y’all. There is a tidal wave of legislation being presented in state legislatures that is anti-LGBTQ+. Much of this is guised as “protecting the children” or “freedom

Before You Say Amen

Happy Pride Month! One tradition I have for Pride since coming out, is to watch primarily queer films, or works by queer directors and actors during the month. Over the years, and out of all the queer films in the world though, I always watch Prayers for Bobby. If you haven’t seen it, it’s based

My 10th Anniversary

So I celebrated my 10th Anniversary of coming out this year. I came out in 2009. Now, back then I thought I came out like this:   But now reflecting back (and for those of you who know me) it was probably more accurate of this:   Cest la vie.   My journey is one

36 Goals

WOW. I’ve inhabited this floating rock for 35 years now. More or less successful. I’ve had the highs I’ve had the lows. Year 35 has been a wild ride. From my professional life to my personal life and everything in between. I’ve gotten lost more than a couple of times during this 35th rotation but I

All in the Last Name

I’ve been asked many times why I decided to change my last name to Hercliff-Proffer. To be honest, it took me the full 21 months of my engagement to decide and even then it wasn’t until 3 weeks before when Michael applied for our license and with much frustration told me that I had to

“Count Your Blessings Instead of Sheep”

One of the longest running traditions for my family was to watch White Christmas on Christmas Eve. We’d get in after Christmas Eve Mass, grab some food my mom had keeping warm in the crockpots and all gather in the TV room to watch It’s a Wonderful Life and White Christmas. Since living on my

#NationalComingOutDay2017

Over the past few years, I’ve shared different components of my coming out story and experiences on this day each year. But this year, I want to share some of the lessons from coming out that I have learned over the years to perhaps helps any one else working through this process. National Coming Out

To Chick-fil-A or Not?

So Chick-fil-A has been in the news lately about their continuation of support for anti-LGBTQ groups. They have continued to make large donations to organizations such as the Fellowship of Christian Athletes and Paul Anderson Youth Home. The anti-LGBTQ position of the infamous chicken restaurant originally came to public knowledge when almost five years ago

The Justification of Gay

One of my fraternity brothers posted this on their Facebook this morning. It’s a really great TedTalk. It’s an interesting approach to the justification that homosexuality is genetic and not a choice.   Now, while I still unpack it, as I watched and listened to this TedTalk, I found myself thinking there was a foundation

The Symbol of Pride

Hey y’all! Pride Month continues and lots to write about. Today though I’m writing to work through some thoughts on the new Philly Pride Flag which has added brown and black stripes to represent the LGBTQIA POC community. First, a little history: The first Pride Flag was flown in 1978 in the San Francisco Gay